Just a quickie.

Well, we nearly made it to Vietnam! Except we decided to go in completely the opposite direction instead. We felt the need for some much needed tropical beach action (don’t hate me) in Sihanoukville, Cambodia. But before we got here, we got all cultured up in Phnom Penh.

Last night my body decided it was bored of the concept of sleeping (after being partially bed-ridden for three days) and so I played a fun game of “lets see how many activities we can get through before we have to get up and be a normal human again”. Four.

This is my best efforts using a paint application on my phone. I think it delicately highlights the fragile state of my mind at 5am in sweaty Cambodia. The dog is questionable. It might be a cat.

Although I had spent my productive night researching the Killing Fields of Phnom Penh (‘The Choeung Ek Genocidal Center’), nothing can really prepare you for the acute sense of loss, helplessness and sadness you feel whilst walking amongst the mass graves (sometimes containing up to 450 bodies). We were supplied with an audio device that talked us through the history of the Killing Fields, and even offered some brave peoples escape stories.. or inability to escape stories.. It hurts your heart.

The grounds themselves were beautiful. Completely juxtaposed with the sequence of events that took place a few decades earlier Chickens run amok in the vegetation, a bridge over a lake (where some graves lay beneath, untouched) and sad looking trees whose boughs stretch across the water. If you haven’t already, I recommend looking up the harrowing history behind this place. People having to dig their own graves before being pushed in alive, and covered in a fatal concoction of chemicals.. Children smashed against trees and adults beaten with a spade until death (bullets were expensive).. Up to 300 people a day were marched to their death after the sounding of eerie anthem celebrating the dictatorship, played to drown out the victims’ screams.

* * *

Another day, another sodding bus journey. Although this time we were treated to Charlie Chaplin on the inbuilt telly which had the locals (and us!) in stitches. I did that embarrassing thing where you fall asleep with your face up against the window for all neighbouring traffic to see. Apart from that, the journey was only four hours, half of what we’re used to, so it wasnt too bad.

Sihanoukville was a laugh. We were constantly enticed into bars with the promise of a free drink

(or 6.)

The main thing i’ll remember about this place is you cannot lay on a sunbed for more than 1 minute without being bombarded by a myriad of asian women and children offering massages, selling bracelets.. You name it. I paid for my bracelet from a little boy with an impromptu English lesson and paid for my 5 minute massage by returning the favour to my little asian lady.

Another thing you can have done, if you enjoy intense pain and lying in awkward positions for extended periods of time, is get your legs ‘threaded’. Essentially it’s getting your legs waxed, hair by individual sodding hair. No pain no gain, as her 5 year old daughter kindly informed me.

We stayed in a lovely little tree house bungalow overlooking the sea with our own porch and hammock. Asides from the GIANT lizard that inhabited it with us, it was a good time.

Next stop: Vietnam.

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Cycling in Cambodia… And other stories.

I’ve been putting off writing this post as, after Koh Tao (repeatedly spelt wrong in my previous post.. D’oh) we headed to the island of Koh Phangan. This island is best known for its debauchery, fire shows, alcohol and of course, the Full Moon Party. Get in.

Not entirely sure how i’d fashion a post out of what occurred on this island, I thought I might skip it altogether. But now that we’ve all recovered, i’ll give it my best shot.

So far on this trip I’ve trained (pleaded frantically with) elephants to perform tasks, bamboo rafted down a winding river, and deep sea dived to earn my SSI scuba qualification.

For the next part of my story I’ll start from the end and work my way back, a la hangover, as all best stories begin.

I woke up at around 10am on the shore with a mouthful of sand, cooking in the southern Thailand sun, with waves lapping at my feet. I opened one crunchy eye (it seems I’d fallen asleep face first in the sand here) and squinted out to sea to find Louise waist deep in water, handbag and clothes included, staring at the glittering ocean. Occasionally our kiwi friend Sam would emerge from the sea like a distressed whale, only to plough back down under for worrying periods of time.

This went on for about 2 hours before I found the strength to be once more vertical, and begin to piece together our loooong night.

Many hours prior to this I remember entering the Full Moon party clad in a hula skirt and neon paint from head to toe. (Or hair to toe, as Lou kindly coloured my hair with seemingly permanent neon green paint.)

The location is one long stretch of beach, crammed with party goers wielding ‘buckets’ and flashy/glowy party paraphernalia. There are practically vertical beach slides (where I managed to slip off the end like a rag doll and hit my noggin – all part of the magic) fire spinners and skipping ropes, also on fire, stages dotted along down the beach each with its own music… You get lost in the hectic atmosphere and before long it was 4am. We made the executive decision to walk up to ‘mellow mountain’ where my life descended into shake-y thoughts and kaleidoscope seas.

..which leads me nicely back to the start of my story.

We did other stuff on Koh Phangan too, honest! The boys rented motorbikes and we hitched a lift to Thailand’s very own (budget) Wipeout course. Hilarious to watch, tiring to complete. (Or so I was told. I spent my time in a hammock instead.)

Afterwards we grabbed some dinner at a restaurant overlooking the sea.

The food was great, though I don’t remember eating all that was on our receipt.

As the sun set we head back to our bungalows where our friend Jordan decided to put on his own fire show with (probably illegal) chains with flammable pieces at each end. He insists on doing this with his eyes closed so he can “feel it”. I decided to go to bed before he turned one of us into a human bonfire.

The next day we head to town. One thing you immediately notice in South East Asia is the amount of DOGS you encounter. Some rabid, some cute,

and some just silly.

As in Thailand, we found some informative bracelets. ‘That’s science’, as Jordan correctly informed us.

My favourite places on this island had to be the Treehouse, where I commandeered a hammock and refused to get out for a few days.

…and the neon reggae bar where I was shocked to learn hippy substances were being sold.

After a week of surviving off toasties from 7/11, we were ready to leave.

We caught the ferry back to Bangkok where I thought we’d catch some rest. We didn’t.

You may recognise these stairs from the opening sequence of The Hangover (which is played in every restaurant and on every TV channel here.)

The Skytower, ‘Lebua’, or Baiyoke Hotel overlooks Bangkok and beyond. Everyone was dressed to the nines and I admit I felt a leeetle out of place in my beach dress. (Who goes backpacking with a cocktail dress?!)

The drinks started from £16 (see: ‘Hangovertini’) so we decided to head to our local for a Chang or 3.

..but not before we stopped on every floor to take pictures and get lost in the mirrored toilets.

One interesting experience was visiting a Bangkok cinema. I was a bit concerned it might end up to be some form of Thai porn, but instead we were treated to Taken 2 which had come out THE DAY BEFORE!! God bless Asia. It was all relatively normal until the pre-movie adverts ended and we all had to stand for the King’s song, during which I dropped my sweeties and started feeling round for them on my knees, to Louise’s disapproval.

Before we left Bangkok we sampled some local delicacies..namely scorpion, larvae and crickets. It seems the only thing with legs Thai people won’t eat is a chair.

Eventually we sorted out visas and made our way to Cambodia! (Siem Reap) ..Which has, so far, turned out to be a dirtier, scammier version of Thailand. Fab.

On the plus side we found an amazingly out of place dessert parlour called Blue Pumpkin. Banana bread, sorbets, macaroons, cakes..

I ate it all.

On a painfully hot day we cycled to Angkor Wat. It was pretty awesome but the heat damn near killed me, even after I’d fashioned a turban out of my sarong.

Before we set off home I played tug-o-war with a monkey that was insistent on nicking bottle of water.

Siem Reap has it’s moments. There’s a street aptly named ‘Pub Street’ where we drank M150 (a version of Redbull that should be illegal) and danced in the street with kids and old people alike.

The next leg of our journey to Phnom Penh was painful. The bus driver was either deaf or paranoid as he beeped his shrill horn every time he saw another car. Or bike. Or bicycle. Or lamppost. He also played what we suspected to be extracts from his wedding video the entire way.

So here we are! Next stop will most likely be Vietnam, all wil be revealed in my next post. For now, here’s a collection of interesting photos i’ve accumulated since my last post:

(My samosa-on-steroids.)

(Yup, chicken on a lamppost.)

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